Love them well…

One of the hardest things I have had to do was sending my kid to college.

Whether our kids stay home after graduation, move away to college, or start working in the work force, there is a lot of transition that takes place.

Transition for the young adult and for the parent.

My son is now about to graduate college, and as I look back over the past four years, they have been the toughest years I have faced as a Mother.

There is the worry of their safety. There is the worry of their influences. There is the worry of their faith. There is the worry of “relationships” they will encounter. There is the worry of drinking and going to parties. There is the worry of their grades.

The thoughts NEVER stop.

For a season, I would wake up at the same time every single night. My mind would race of things that could be going wrong with my son.

I took those thoughts and fears in the middle of the night as an opportunity to pray.

Can’t sleep? Maybe it’s a nudge from God to pray.

I know for a fact that I am not alone in this. I have had several friends reach out to me through the years for prayer over their post-high school kids.

Our kids are bombarded with choices, influences, spiritual warfare.

Many of them pull away from the family, from church, from anything “good and pure”.

Many of them struggle with horrible anxiety, depression, weight loss, weight gain, binge drinking, binge partying, binge sexual relationships.

Although as parents we may want to put our heads in the sand and cry, we MUST pray for our kids.

We must encourage them, support them, love them well.

Don’t give up on them.

It may be tempting to scold them, chastise them and tell them how disappointed we are in them…but refrain.

LOVE them.

Feed them.

PRAY for them.

Visit them.

God’s Word never returns void.

If they are lost from the flock, I believe they will come back.

He leaves the 99 for the 1 lost.

As parents we all have big dreams for our children…and sometimes those dreams get shattered.

God is bigger than those dreams, sweet momma.

He can make something out of absolutely nothing.

Remember, we were made from dust.

A year ago, we moved churches.

We started going to a church that was closer to my son’s college.

We wanted to do anything to make it easier for him to come to church with us.

I was desperate for God’s word to seep into his heart.

'“Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

One Sunday morning, I woke up and began getting ready for church.

I looked at my Life 360 app and saw that my son had gotten back to his apartment at 3:38 am.

I exhaled a deep sigh, deflated.

I just knew he would not be coming to the 9:30 service with us.

An hour later we pulled into the church parking lot, and there in the lot was his car.

He was sitting there waiting for us.

I could have cried my eyes out.

Of course, I wanted to ask him what in the world he was doing at 3:38 am the night before, but I didn’t

I gave him the biggest hug and told him how happy I was to see him.

He looked tired. His hair was disheveled. His clothes were wrinkled.

I could have cared less.

When we are tempted to throw guilt at our young adult kids, don’t.

Guilt will never draw them closer to us or to Jesus.

Only Love will.

Love them like Jesus.

Welcome them like Jesus.

Jesus said, “let the little children come to me….” (Matthew 19:14) and I think that included our young adult children.

If you do not have children at this age yet, please consider praying for your friend’s kids that are this age

It is a hard season of life.

The pressures are grueling. Not just academically, but in every area.

Reach out to those young adults. Take them to lunch. Send them encouraging texts. Build them up. Encourage them.

I can promise you…they need it.

They may never tell you or ask for help….but one day down the road they will remember how you loved them during this season.

The mothers of those kids will remember too.

Let’s be a sanctuary of rest for our children. Offering them love, prayers, understanding and encouragement instead of judgement and chastisement.

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sin. 1 Peter 4:8

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Ephesians 4:2

If you would like a wonderful resource that I have read from cover to cover since my oldest was in high school…it is this prayer book…

The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian

Also for prayers for adult children…

The Power of praying for your Adult Children by Stormie Omartian

Keep praying, keep fighting for them on your knees.

NEVER give up on them.

love them well,

jill